Colors

Another freewrite about our favorite color and what it would say if it could talk.

I don't wear you much despite my attraction to your hue. Perhaps, I can not match your intensity, just aspire to it. If you could talk, you would say that you didn't know why you were placed as Hello Kitty's original color mascot even when you knew I didn't like cats. You would tell me how confusing it felt when you first appeared on my pants in 9th grade PE. You would tell me that red are always the best candy flavors. You would tell me you always showed up with every skinned knee to remind me that I still live. You would say tomato sauce always taste better than cream. You would tell me the blood that runs in my veins are wrapped in ancestral strength and that is my inheritance. You would say my heart beats bigger than I ever realize. You would tell me that this bracelet wrapped on my left wrist is the symbol of my refuge. You would tell me you are my favorite color because you spark my passion and fuel my indignation.

But what you would secretly whisper is that you actually wish to be blue. To bring deep sea depth and calmness to my restlessness. To bring soft winds to my nomadic heart. To carve a direction back home.

Sacred Places

Now and days, most of the writing I do is from writing prompts at ReWrite meetings. Oh, how I am grateful.
The prompt was, what places do I hold sacred?

It is the place between my heart and a breath. This is where I hold the rise of my anxiety and also the place where I quell it with calmness. It is a place between my eyelids where I keep monkey thoughts in jeweled chests. It is a place where my mind meets the rustle of redwood trees. It is a place to go when there is no where else to hold these explosions. It is in the deep crevices of my heart. Under folds and through my lungs. It is a place where butterfly wings touch time to make impermanence. It is a place of grace and compassion weaved into my breaths. It is a place where I breathe in my sacred and breathe out my redemption.

Quick Haikus

Some haikus I did while I was on the plane to DC a month ago.

The stars are bitter
seeing me embrace your light
you burn right through me.

Tonight you hold me
My heart rests on your closed lips
Love, give me a breath.

I am counting stars
dancing my way back to you
Believe me, to hold my hand.

Lovely, kiss me now
I might become the ethers
in limbo, waiting.

2/30

It's hard when I don't have someone on my ass everyday to write a poem like I did last year. :(

Knock, knock
All you hear is a solid thud
as my heart has turned into cement
Blood courses through my body
I swim through it,
I see nothing but the vast redness.

As I swim further, the walls of my veins
have frozen and I feel nothing
It is strange to be inside your body
and feel nothing
A vast nothingness.

A cave resembling my empty chest cavity
echoes with memories of
lovers tagging walls
and etching their initials into the groove of my ribs
They are forever permanently stained where my heart existed

I use to believe that love will set me free
Instead freedom exists only within my heart, stained with my initials.

1/30 for 2011

Late post into the NaPoWriMo. Short one tonight. Got home late.

Every morning I wake up with a headache of you.
Showers become sifting explorations
Going under each and every memory
for a fault
a crack
a fissure
anything to indicate you would pick him
over me

but there are none. every stone is polished.
bright and deceiving.
all that is left are these bag of shiny pebbles you left me with
to remember by.
how i yearn to dump them all out.
instead, i keep my chest heavy.